2) When calling about an unsolicited press release, please read it verbatim down the telephone, barely pausing for breath in case the editor finds a window of opportunity to tell you it’s irrelevant.

3) Please ensure that you can’t be contacted on Friday afternoons.

* Editors are always disappointed when their host fails to give them a souvenir letter opener, corkscrew, pen knife or similar gift when they’re travelling with carry on baggage on a plane.

* PR which doesn’t have as many superlatives as possible is likely to be rejected for lack of effort

* Always use ‘unique’ — it doesn’t matter whether you understand why you’re using it or not, the editor will always give the release closer attention

* Always phone the editor to ask whether you can send them an email. The editor will be pleased to work with you to determine whether your computer is capable of sending emails.

* Then, having sent an email, please follow up a few months later and ask the editor whether they received it and if they are going to use the information. They’ll be pleased you reminded them.

* Never forget to send a cheap clock with the company logo

* When working from a 75 slide PPT, always hit the ‘end’ button when moving from slide 1 to slide 2 and not ‘page down’. Editors are always pleased to find out you’re going to give them all the information they’ll need — and more.

* When arranging a conference call, make sure your client uses the speakerphone function in an echoing room and sits as far away from the phone as possible. And, as Caroline helpfully notes, make sure the presentation the editor has differs significantly from the presenter’s.